“Sometimes I’ve Believed In As Many As Six Impossible Things Before Breakfast.”
Good day, Cyberspace! It is once again
Monday night Tuesday, which means that I need to stop procrastinating and write this stupid blog post have written a remarkable blog post to share with you guys.
By the way, is it just me, or does it seem like the Tuesdays are getting rapidly closer with increasing fervor? It feels like just two days ago was Tuesday.
Yesterday was Tuesday.
Today is Tuesday.
It is my theory that this is a governmental conspiracy designed to kill Tuesday bloggers by forcing them to deteriorate into nothing more than a pile of sludge from typing too much.
This is obviously a strikingly accurate theory.
Anyway, do you guys remember back in the very beginnings of Smudged Thoughts, when the Tuesdays were turquoise, the dragons were roaming the skies, and dwarves lurked within each nook and cranny?
Yeah. Those days are long behind us.
I feel like lately this world has been a very boring little place. Dreary, some might say. The rain used to bring me unending happiness.
Now it’s just wet.
So today I’d like to return to my roots, back to when the sky was purple, the trees whispered ancient songs in my ears, and the world was square. ‘Cause that world is the best.
And what better way to return to that impossible world than to contemplate just that? The impossible.
Ah, yes. The impossible. Don’t you just love that word? It’s telling you that something so wonderful, colorful, magical, and mind-boggling is just way too extraordinary to fit within the confines of this world.
And that is exactly why I’m bound and determined that they do, in fact, exist.
So, without further ado, I give you–
Six Impossible Things That I Believe In (before lunch)
Number One– Dragons
This one is easy. Dragons–though many sane people will try to convince you otherwise–exist. They are there, living somewhere far off beyond the clouds, hiding within the depths of dark caves in fear of the human race.
Why do they hide, you ask?
Because they are different. They are majestic creatures, powerful, able to destroy a multitude of skin-people with a single breath from their lungs, yet they hide because they are frightened of what we will think of them. We dream about the day that they will show themselves to us, yet the minute they do, we will brand them as monsters and destroy them.
So instead they stay hidden, coming out only when the grey clouds roll across the skies in a blanket of smoke. That is when they are free from their mountain cages. They stretch their wings, they soar, and they thunder across the sky in a multitude of fire.
Number Two– Harry Potter
Or, more specifically, Harry Potter’s world. Because wizards and witches and Hogwarts and Nifflers and Newt Scamander and Bowtruckles exist. J.K. Rowling simply stumbled across an entire world hidden in plain sight, and she has blessed us all by recounting her adventures within this realm.
Number Three– Parallel Universes
Doesn’t every single television show prove the existence of these universes? Fringe, Doctor Who, ect.
(ect. stands for I can’t think of anything else)
Basically, there is an alternate universe, probably lost out there in the unending expanse of galaxies, and in that universe there is someone who looks just like me and acts slightly different.
Perhaps her mind is more stable, or her obsessions include normal things like celebrities and the latest fashion trends instead of ice cream and murdering fictional characters.
So she’s just a lamer version of me, basically.
Number Four– Elemental Powers
This one is a personal favorite. I’ve always wanted to control water. My name, however, actually means ‘fireborn’, or ‘born of fire’, so I think if I had an elemental power, it would be control of flames.
Which further supports my claim of being the Dragon Princess, so BOOM.
Number Five– Alien Lifeforms
AND YOU CANNOT CONVINCE ME OTHERWISE.
Seriously, guys. This universe is SO EPICLY HUGE. How in the world can we be the only forms of life within the ENTIRE THING???
It is impossible.
Number Six– I Can Slay The Jabber–wait, wrong thingy…
Number Six– I Can Write A Book
This, especially at this exact moment, seems impossible to me, so therefore it is, in fact, possible. A book is only words, and I’m brimming full of them.
But if I can believe the impossible is possible, the improbable is probable, and the most far-fetched tale is sound logic, then I can write a book.
And also slay the Jabberwocky, because that would be awesome.
Well, for me, not the Jabberwocky. Let’s not get ahead of ourselves.