good morning, cyberspace!
Ladies and gentleman, boys and girls, cookies and creme puffs, cyborgs and androids — welcome one and all to the grande finale of the glorious, the wondrous, the most amazing and spectacular event of 2018 — March Hare Madness!
I know, I know. This comes as quite the shock to you all. After all
(this is too many all’s in one paragraph. . .), March only started a few short weeks ago. It can’t possibly be over yet. Not now. Not right when we’re beginning to get into the swing of Spring.
But alas, my friends. It is true. March, though we love it dearly, is ending, and March Hare Madness shall end along with it.
And boy am I grateful.
I don’t know about you guys, but I am getting ex-trem-ely bored of all these March Hare Madness updates. It’s the exact same thing every. single. week. There’s no diversity. No off-beat. No enticing rhythm. I’m over here snoozing and growing a few grey hairs because I have to write yet another post on how my writerly week went. (or didn’t go. aha. [we’ll get into that later.])
It’s just ew. I want this to be over with. And thankfully, this is the last week!
So! Let’s just get this over with, shall we? I’ve got an awesome interview due next Tuesday, and after that, we can finally get back to the usual fun and spontaneity that happens in this tiny corner of Cyberspace.
· · · · ·
· · · The Weekly Recap! · · ·
March Hare Madness! — Part Two, Week Four
Goal . . . edit things/finish book . . .
Edits Completed . . . 0-ish? . . .
Edits Remaining . . . ??? . . .
I need help.
See, remember that cold from last week? Yeah. That thing completely knocked me out, guys. Literally. The cold/fever/nausea that lasted two of the seven days completely threw off all my momentum to write and filled me with tons of doubts as to whether or not this story is even any good and got me completely hooked on the terribly addicting thing that is Gilmore Girls and forced me to begin knitting a beautiful scarf and basically I’ve gotten absolutely nothing done this entire week because of Cold™.
It’s a problem. And all of this was totally the cold’s fault. Not mine at all. I have #willpower and #drive to do the #things.
*insert nervous laughter here*
But aside from the fact that I’ve watched four seasons of Gilmore Girls in six days
(pretty sure I should get a medal for this? no?), I suppose this week wasn’t an entire failure. I did do some productive things. Like knit that scarf Like edit through some chapters and background check all of my characters’ ages and history and backstory and all that jazz. I stuck mostly to the smaller, more mundane editing tasks, because right now I’m having some serious issues with this story, and I really didn’t want to dive face-first into the more crucial edits with both my bloody pitchfork and a head full of fever that made me think every single word had to be rewritten before it could ever be seen by human eyes.
However, I am happy to report that I am feeling muchly better now, and have finally resumed editing at a slow, yet steady pace. There are some scenes coming up that I’m REALLY not looking forward to editing, but I think with a little more self-control, a lot less Gilmore Girls bingeing, and just a sprinkling of pixie-dust, I might be able to get this book whipped into a sort-of-readable state for my betas.
It’s a stretch, my friends, but today. . .I am taffy.
· · · · ·
· · · Week Four Highlights! · · ·
- The cold is gone! . . . which means that I can finally begin working on everlost again. Hopefully. But first I need to ween myself off Netflix, and as any Netflix addict knows, this is impossible. So.
- I’ve read through some of the rougher chapters of everlost that I initially thought were going to be DREADFUL, but have now come to the conclusion that they are only sort of bad . . . which is good. . . .I think. . .?
- And that’s basically it . . . I’ve literally done nothing this week, guys. No editing. No writing. No Camp NaNo Prepping (can you believe that Camp NaNoWriMo is in just four days??? this is insanity, my friends. i have absolutely no idea what i’m doing. help me.)
- Oh! Wait! One more thing. . .
- This is the last March Hare Madness Post of forever! HUZZAH!!!!!
seriously, this is a blessing.
I wish I had more to talk about for the past week, but I’ve really got nothing. Basically all I’ve done for the last seven days is try to recover from this nasty cold, and now that I’ve done that, I’m kind of at a loss as to how to continue the editing process. I’ve found myself plagued with many doubts and uncertainties about my writing recently, and constantly being bombarded by negative thoughts makes it extremely difficult to pick up my laptop and keep going. But doubts are something that every writer — great or small — must learn to deal with, and I am no different. Doubts are, quite unfortunately, a necessary part of the writerly package.
Along with chocolate. And blueberry yogurt pretzels. And ice cream.
So I really don’t have all that much to complain about here.
Now, I am once again skipping over the What’s Happening segment of these posts, because I feel like I’ve already skimmed this — I’ve started knitting a scarf. I’ve watched Netflix. I dipped my pinky toes into the burning pool of sulfur that is editing. I’ve gotten over my cold. I’ve completely abandoned my email. I’ve become a hermit and moved to the misty mountains cold. I’ve changed my name to Gandalf the Grey. I died and became Gandalf the White.
Life is good, but constantly talking about all the things I’ve done week after week is extraordinarily tiring, so I’m just going to hop right along and get to the fun part — the interview.
Because that is literally all I’m here for.
(thank goodness March Hare Madness is ending.)
And so, without further ado, it is with the utmost pleasure that I introduce you to one of the minor — yet still greatly significant
and possibly dead — characters of everlost. . .
(i still can’t disclose his last name. #oops)
· · · · ·
· · · Let’s Chat With The Cast! · · ·
Kenzie: Gooooood morning, everybody, and welcome to yet another glorious episode of Let’s Chat With The Cast! Now, in a rather unfortunate twist of events, I do not have the entire cast of everlost here with me today. They are. . .shall I say. . .currently otherwise engaged. However — luckily for us — I have here with me a very, very special guest. He is a friend to all, a stranger to none, and one of the main key components to the entire Locket. Ladies and gentleman, boys and girls, allow me to introduce you to. . .
*insert polite smattering of applause*
Kenzie: Thank you so very much for being here today, Nate. I am so glad you could join us.
Nathaniel: Well, it’s not like I had much of a choice, is it? There’s not much you can do when a random man with a pitchfork yanks you down into a hidden television studio. Actually, where are we again? Shouldn’t this be the morgue? Is Mr. Crowe expanding the Locket again?
Kenzie: Er. . .yes. . .?
Nathaniel: Neat. I’ll have to ask him about the nacho bar. . .
Kenzie: Actually, Nate, you were brought here today to answer a few questions for us. Is that all right with you?
Nathaniel: Would no be a valid answer?
Nathaniel: Shame. Well, go on then. Ask away.
Kenzie: Lovely. My first question is about your position in the Locket.
Kenzie: You’re the head of security, correct?
Nathaniel: Oh, that’s a massive understatement. I am the security. There ain’t nothing that happens in this hospital that Nathaniel —- doesn’t know about. Not a thing. There used to be quite a few of us on the team, actually — back before things got a little weird, you know? But now it’s just me. Not sure where all the others went. Crowe said they retired, which I s’pose would make sense if Kyle hadn’t been thirty-two when he went all AWOL. Kinda fishy if you ask me. Like the mackerel they serve on Mondays.
Kenzie: Aha. . . Right.
Nathaniel: Guess I’m pretty indispensable now. Got eyes everywhere, even in the back of my head, some say. But nothing exciting ever happens in the Locket nowadays. It’s all kind of gone downhill a bit. Of course, there’s all them people getting shipped in from the mainland recently. Crowe’s recruited some of the best doctors and neuro-surgeons on either side of the ocean, so I guess that explains why this place is always crawling with weirdos now. Bit odd, though. I tell ya, this place keeps on getting weirder by the day.
Kenzie: Is that so?
Nathaniel: Yeah. Thao’s always thought this place was a tad bit off, right? Says the whole building is drugged. But just between you and me, something’s not right with him, either. I’m not sure what’s happened, but ever since that little thing from the top floor got loose, he’s been all. . .odd. Haven’t seen him in days, actually. It’s like he’s plum disappeared off the face of the island.
Kenzie: Uh-huh. Do you think you could go into any more detail on the little thing from the top floor?
Nathaniel: Oh, sure. She’s a psych ward patient, isn’t she? Some experiment went terribly wrong, see, and this little fire-haired waif got loose. Murdered three men, actually. Well, that one guy is still hanging in the balance, I guess, but he’s always been a weak one. Probably won’t hold out till the weekend. Thao’s betting three days — I’m at four currently, but debating bringing it up to five. Turns out he might be stabilizing.
Kenzie: You guys are placing bets on someone’s life?
Nathaniel: His death, actually. A bit different if you think about it. Course, Thao’s totally going to lose. He always does at things like this. That year’s supply of tacos is as good as mine.
Kenzie: You’re betting on someone’s life. . .with a wager of a year’s supply of tacos.
Kenzie: . . .
Kenzie: I’m just. . .I’m just going to move on to the audience questions now.
Nathaniel: Great. Actually, if you could hurry this up, I really need to get back to the cafeteria. I was just on my way to the burger stand before that creepy guy dragged me in here.
Kenzie: That would be my stenographer. I actually have just two more questions to ask you, Nate. Think you can stave off your hunger for three more minutes?
Nathaniel: That’s debatable. Better make ’em snappy.
Kenzie: Of course. The topic of the next two questions is someone who I assume you are very close to, so I’m sure you won’t have any trouble answering them.
Nathaniel: That dancing taco on the corner of Main?
Kenzie: Wha–? No. No, it is not the dancing taco on the corner of Main.
Nathaniel: Oh. Well, that’s embarrassing.
Kenzie: . . .
Nathaniel: So who is it, then?
Kenzie: Thao Crowe.
Nathaniel: Ah! Yeah, that probably should have been my first guess. . .
Kenzie: You would think.
Nathaniel: But are we positive that Thao isn’t the dancing taco on the corner of Main?
Kenzie: . . .
Kenzie: I’m fairly confident that Thao is not a dancing taco, Nate.
Kenzie: . . . I’m going to skip to the questions now.
Kenzie: Both of our questions today actually come from the same person — a lovely, wonderfully smol bean known as Jem! (thank you so much, Jem!!!) And I am UBER excited to ask you these, because I am quite literally dying to know the answers myself. So. Let’s get right into it, shall we?
Nathaniel: Sounds great.
Kenzie: Wonderful! First question — Which one is worse to be around — Thao or Jevron?
Nathaniel: Ah, well, that’s definitely an easy one. Thao and I have been buds for. . .oh, I’d say four-ish years? He’s my bro, you know? But his grandfather is a nut. An absolute nut. I hate talking to that guy. He’s got some serious issues.
Kenzie: So Jevron is the worst Crowe to be around, then?
Kenzie: Do you have any specific anecdotes to back up this decision?
Nathaniel: Other than the fact that he’s a complete nutter? . . .Nope. Not really.
Kenzie: Right. That sounds completely logical.
Kenzie: Second and final question, then — Between Thao and Jevron, which one is more of a drama queen?
Nathaniel: Ha! Another easy one, my friend. Thao, hands down. Mr. Crowe may be a nutter, but Thao’s got all the chill of a broken down air conditioner.
Kenzie: That’s quite possibly the most accurate description of Thao Crowe I have ever heard in my life.
Nathaniel: Yeah, well, I’ve known him forever. He’s a great guy, Thao. Just a bit eccentric. Isn’t all that fond of nachos, either, which is just weird, in my opinion. But he’s still a great guy. A good friend. In fact, I’m willing to bet you fifty bucks that he’s got something to do with that dancing taco.
Kenzie: I. . .really don’t think he has anything to do with the taco, Nate.
Nathaniel: Yeah, well, we’ll see. That taco’s got some sick moves, man. I’m asking Thao about it as soon as I get out of here.
Kenzie: Oh, yes. About that. It seems as though we’re going to have to cut our interview slightly short today. I’ve just received direct orders from HQ that you’re needed down in Jevron’s office, and they say you’re needed immediately. Sorry, Nate.
Nathaniel: Jevron’s office? That’s weird. I’ve never been summoned there before. You don’t think he heard me call him a nutter, do you?
Kenzie: Seeing as though we are currently in a live interview blasted all across Crocodoc, the chance of that would be very likely.
Kenzie: Oh, I wouldn’t worry too much about it! I’m sure everything’s going to be just fine. You just scurry on along, and I’ll take care of everything down here. Thank you so much for joining us today, Nate! I’m really glad I could catch you before you were removed.
Kenzie: *turns towards cameraman* Unfortunately for us, that is all we’ve got for today, folks! Thank you all so much for being here today, and be sure to stay tuned next week for the last everlost interview of the month, in which the entire cast of everlost returns once more for their final farewell!
Nathaniel: Um. . .what did you mean by ‘removed’ exactly?
Kenzie: As always, I hope you all have a fantastically marvelous day, and until next time. . .
Nathaniel: Ms. Kenzie?
Kenzie: *flings cookies in the air and disappears*
· · · · ·
talk to me, peasants!
MARCH HARE MADNESS IS FINALLY OVER!!!!
Or rather, the update posts are. AND I COULD NOT BE MORE THANKFUL. I am finally free of all these monotonous posts, my friends! HUZZAH!
The freedom. It is beautiful.
Actually, I might have a tiny little update on how the month rounds out next Tuesday, but whatever. For right now. . .DOBBY IS FREEEEEE!
. . .
(i have no shame.)
Can you tell that I’m excited? Because I am very excited. I can finally start to write all the happy little posts that I’m actually excited to write. This is glorious, my friends. Absolutely glorious.
And also kind of scary. Aha.
But anyway! Enough about me
and the fact that I’ve utterly failed Part Two of March Hare Madness! How has your week been? Have you gotten any writing done? Any Camp NaNo Prepping? What did you think of Nathaniel? (Nate is yet another character that I’m trying to crack in this second draft, so I’m really sorry if this interview felt a little off. he’s a weird one.) Now that I’m feeling better, I’m really excited to dive right back into the beautiful blogosphere, so go ahead and tell me ALL OF THE THINGS down in the comments below, okay? I want to know everything that’s happening in all of your wonderful writerly lives! (and also tips on how to break free from the iron jaws of Netflix, because I’m having some serious trouble here, guys…)
As always, until next time. . .
*flings cookies into the air and disappears*