FALLING DOWN THE RABBIT HOLE: reacting to my blog search histories

good morning, cyberspace!

Today’s post is one that I am v e r y excited about, my friends. Recently I read a post from my enviously talented friend, Kate, in which she went through her blog search histories and commented on all the weird and wacky searches that brought slightly grammatically challenged Googlers to her blog. As she said in her post, this is something that Cait from Paper Fury has done on numerous occasions in her monthly recaps, and something that I–inspired by Cait–have also done in the past. (I’m a pirate, what can I say. [although one could argue that it’s not true piracy when I blatantly admit that the idea is 100% not my own? but whatever. LET ME BE A PIRATE, PEASANTS!!!!])

Ahem. Moving on.

Today, as you could probably guess, I’m going to be reacting to my most recent search histories! I feel like a sufficient amount of time has passed for me to have some decent pileage to sift through, so without further ado, let’s crack open that Search Terms bar and find some things to comment on!

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i. gif of wicked witch of the west saying curses

Um. . .? I’m not entirely sure why this particular search brought you to my blog, but I think I may know what you’re looking for.

There you go. It’s always my goal to make sure my readers are taken care of.

ii. the pros and cons of the boy from wonder going to school // pros and cons of the book wonder // what were the cons and pros of august of wondergoing to school // strength and weakness of the book wonder // pros and cons of auggie going to school // what are some cons of auggie going to school

Fun Fact: I definitely don’t know what the pros and cons are for August Pullman going to school in the book Wonder. But I can definitely tell you some cons to writing a pro/con review of the book Wonder!

Con #1 – THIS.

iii. super villian cliches

Okay, so technically I wrote a whole post about Villain Cliches about three thousand years ago (it was initially going to be part of a series, but . . . lol. that has unfortunately not happened yet), but holy guacamole. I never even thought about doing supervillain cliches???

Someone get on this. I need this list in my life STAT.

iv. reviews of amazingflings.com

Uh . . . okay, so I have absolutely no clue what this website is, and honestly, I’m a little scared to look?

*one google search later*

Aha. Okay. So to save you the trouble of googling this and having it forever scarred in your search history (as it is now in mine), I’m just going to put it politely and say that it looks like a “dating app”. But since you’re apparently here for a review on this particular website, allow me to give you what you came for.

— KENZIE’S REVIEW OF NOT SO AMAZING FLINGS —

PROS — none

CONS — this site exists

OVERALL OPINIONS — Don’t use this website. It’s creepy and looks like something my great uncle Carl would use to try and find his next serial murder victim.

The end.

v. otp writing challenge

Yesssssss!!! This challenge was SO much fun to do! I highly recommend it to any writer out there looking for a fun, easy post to draft. Of course, my version of this tag was slightly weird because I *cough* don’t write romance, but you can still check it out right here if you’re interested!

vi. bookpub a scam

I believe we’re missing an important ‘is‘ in there, and the answer to that is YES. Anything with the word ‘pub’ in it sounds like a scam to me. (although this is coming from the girl who thought the NaNoWriMo site was going to give her a virus, so….?)

Now, if you were asking me about bookbub, on the other hand . . . then the answer to that is probably still a yes. I wouldn’t trust it.

Be safe, people. Scams are everywhere.

vi. an experiment is a beautiful thing it is an adventure

Oh my word, I wholeheartedly agree with your rather strangely worded and grammatically incorrect sentence! (there should be a semi-colon in there, friend.) But I digress. An experiment IS a beautiful thing, and it is most certainly an adventure. What a wonderful way to phrase that!

vii. am ia pile of disappointment

Well then. This is probably the saddest search term I have in my inbox.

No, friend. You are most definitely NOT a pile of disappointment. And I sincerely hope that if this search term really and truly did bring you to my blog, that you come away from my posts with a smile on your face and the knowledge that you’re worth more than diamonds and rubies and the whole force of a dragon’s hoard.

Whatever made you google this, just know that it does get better eventually. Okay? Okay.

. . . and lastly, our final search term of the day. . .

viii. smudged thoughts

AHA!!! See??? At least someone knows what to put into Google to find some quality content.

Whoever did this, you’re my new favorite. <333

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talk to me, peasants!

And there you have it, friends! This post is rather short and sweet, I know, but there have been Things going on in my life–things to prepare for, things to do, things to REMEMBER–and I’ve just kinda been hiding from the internet like the scared little chameleon that I am. This is what happens when I get stressed out, apparently. I HIDE. (does anyone else do this? No? Just me? Okay then…)

But anyway! On to the questions!:

• what is the weirdest search you’ve ever found in your history?
• have you ever read the book Wonder? and if so, DO YOU KNOW THE PROS AND CONS OF HIM GOING TO SCHOOL? because I seriously get like eight of these every month, apparently.
• have you ever tried bookpub (or even bookBUB), and is it a scam? the public needs to know.

And lastly, most important of all–

DO YOU KNOW OF ANY SUPERVILLAIN CLICHES????

Because holy guacamole that would be so much fun to draft. . . *eyes messy drafts folder warily*

As always, let’s talk about ALL OF THE THINGS! down in the comments below! And until next time. . .

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