everlost: A Second Draft Update (and also a smol rant because #whynot)

Good morning, Cyberspace! It is currently 11:32 am on Monday, the 19th of June, and I have decided to take a smol break from rewriting everlost because A) I need a post for tomorrow and even though I have like 11 posts that should technically be ready to schedule in my writing folder, they’re all unfinished so it’s obviously easier to just write an entirely new post one day in advance, and B) I am physically and mentally dead.

*breathes in deeply because #longsentencewithterriblepunctuation*

And what better way to take a break from writing my book than to hop on over to my blog and rant about my book, am I right?

Of course I’m right. I’m always right.

The Evil Writer Award (in which I am evil and ruthless [as usual])

Bonjour, mon Cyberespace! I am so uber (yes this is a word what are you talking about) excited for today’s Smudge!!!! And do you know why?

Do you?

Do you???

DO YOU?

“You only have ONE CHANCE to tell this story!” (and why this advice is utter rubbish)

Good afternoon, Cyberspace!

There are about a million and one tips and tricks that people just LOVE to blurt out when it comes to the struggle of writing, aren’t there? Writers love to give other writers encouragement. NON-writers love to give writers encouragement.

Pinterest loves to give writers encouragement

And I’m willing to bet that all of you have heard this lovely piece of advice at one time or another:

“This is your ONE CHANCE to tell this story! This is your story, your words, your world that you have built from nothing! Own it! You have one chance!”

In fact, I’ll admit it–I’m completely guilty of flinging out this little line when it comes to giving writing help.

And I’m sure that this particular piece of advice comes from the well-meaning encourager trying to tell people that their story is 100% uniquely their own and only they can tell the story the way that they want to tell it and they shouldn’t worry about throwing ALL OF THE THINGS into their story because, again, their beautiful minds are unique and perfect and all that–

HOWEVER.

I have come to the firm conclusion that this is one of the most rubbish pieces of advice that I have ever heard in my entire life.

And here’s why.

7 Websites I Initially Thought Were Scams (but will not, apparently, hack into your computer and rob you blind)

Happy Friday, Cyberspace!

Remember last Tuesday when I said that I wasn’t going to just randomly disappear into thin air? Well, guess who just randomly disappeared into thin air this past week?

That’s right. This cookie right here.

But never you fear, my smol crumb, for I have returned to you with a thousand and one excuses as to my absence that I shall not be naming because A) they’re extremely lame and not at all worthy of my absence, and B) I only have like three excuses.

HOWEVER! I have not been completely MIA, as I actually wrote a guest post over on the wonderful Alex’s blog, Lord Of The Trekkies, which was posted yesterday! So technically I still posted something this week? Just…not on my own blog.

Yeah.

My Amazing (and completely impossible) Summertime Goals (In Which I Disappear For About A Month [or three?])

Happy Tuesday, Cyberspace!

Now, I’m not sure if any of you have noticed this, but it seems that no matter what blog I happen to stumble across in the maniacal blogosphere lately, every human, cyborg, and chocolate chip cookie is posting their totally envious writing/blogging/life goals for this upcoming summer. And seeing everyone get so excited to make goals and be held within the gnarly, snaggled claws of accountability of the Great and Terrible Cyberspace, well…

I was inspired.

I mean, what better way to stick to your writing goals than by blasting them out into the internet for everyone to see? If you happen to achieve them, everyone cheers and applauds and throws cookies at your face in celebration.

And if you fail, everyone screams at you like a wild black-toothed banshee and stabs you in the left toe with a rusted metal pitchfork.

Or, in other words, you feel extremely ashamed of yourself and stab your own left toe with a rusted metal pitchfork whilst looking like you just got the worst sunburn across your face because #SHAME.

Book Bites: Five Books You Probably Have Not Read (and that you totally should)

Good evening, Cyberspace! As you all probably know by now, Smudged Thoughts is basically a Writer’s Resort where I scream and yell at you all with spittle flinging from my snarled teeth about how to be a better, more productive (bahahahahahaha) writer.

Well, today I’m going to be doing something a little bit different. (as usual)

Today, we shall be venturing into the world of books.

As in books that are actually and physically available to buy, and not just sitting on a hard-drive in your computer looking like the soggy, half-finished cookie that it is.

The Sunshine Blogger Award (YET AGAIN!)

Good afternoon, Cyberspace! I have come to the conclusion that I must be the most sunshiney person on this beloved planet, because WHAT DO YOU KNOW?

I have been tagged YET AGAIN for the Sunshine Blogger Award!! Which is fantastic, because obviously I love telling all you stalkers sane human beings ALLLLL about me and the relatively boring life that I lead.

Anyway, this time around, I have been tagged by the amazing Anna from Writerly Wonderings (and you should totally go check out her blog, because it is one of my absolute favorites).

Thank you SO much for nominating me, Anna! I absolutely love doing these tags… (not to mention they provide a ‘get out of doing an original blog post free card’ [but we shall not linger on that fact…]) I am literally dying to answer these (especially 1, 2, 3, and 8), so I’m going to just jump straight in, because I’m really bad at intros.

The Smudged Thoughts PictoPrompter: Episode Two

G’day, Cyberspace! As you can probably guess by my extremely boring and predictable title, today is the second installment in my brand new bloggy fandangle thingy-ma-bobbin–The Smudged Thoughts PictoPrompter! WHOO!

*crickets chirping*

I was actually expecting episode one to be a giant flop, but it turns out that people actually responded really well to it, and, to my immense shock, we even got some participators!

So before we dive into this month’s prompt, I’d like to give you a few moments to go back and check out last month’s participants, who wrote some really spectacular stories based on last month’s image, which was–

–that thing.

9 Things I Didn’t Know About Writing A Second Draft

Good morning, Cyberspace! As you all probably know, about a month-ish ago I finished the first draft of my current WIP, everlost. It was exciting. It was exhilarating. It was one of the most epic feelings I’ve ever experienced.

And in the Smudge I wrote a few weeks back telling you all about it, I ended the post with the words–

The first draft is done. The second draft is here.

And I am ready.

And to that, there is only one thing I can say–

LIES! LIES, PRECIOUS! IT LIES TO US!

I don’t think that was an actual Gollum quote…

I, Cyberspace, am not ready.

At all.

Nineteen Facts You Never Knew About Me…

Good morning, Cyberspace!

It has come to my attention that sometime during the past week, I have miraculously accumulated 100 followers.

And this is both extremely terrifying and slightly cool.

Extremely terrifying because there are 100 insane weirdos who thought, “Hey! This blog is pretty cool! I shall hit the follow button and STALK THEM FOR ETERNITY.”

Slightly cool because there are 100 insane weirdos who thought, “Hey!” This blog is pretty cool! I shall hit the follow button and STALK THEM FOR ETERNITY.”

And I cannot thank you enough for hitting that follow button.

All 101 of you. (OOH! I shall call you the Dalmatians!!! [if anyone else hits that follow button and ruins this beautiful thing that has spontaneously occurred, I shall come after you with a pitchfork and a slab of concrete.])

And so, in honor of all you fluffy Dalmatians, I have decided to do something a little bit different today–as is the custom of this delightful blog. Instead of the normal rant-tastic post, I’m gonna do a little bit of a trivia thingy, in which I sporadically divulge information about myself that you probably never would have guessed just by reading my blog posts and feeding me your leftover cookies.