March-Hare Madness! – An Announcement

good morning, cyberspace!

has anyone else ever noticed that I NEVER post these things in the morning anymore . . .? no? just me?

ANYWAY. I’ve got a bit of an unusual post for all of you today, (because there’s such a thing as usual posts around here. i swear. they totally exist.) and though I absolutely DESPISE writing update posts (#BORING), today I am making an exception.

A very rare exception, mind you. This shall never happen again. (lies)

HOWEVER, despite my supreme disgust and boredom of writing update posts, there happens to be something BIG shifting within my writerly stars this next month — something that I’m really, really excited about sharing with you all.

And no. I am not getting published. That kind of a shift would rip gargantuan wormholes through the fabric of the space-time continuum, my friends.

Instead, today, I am going to be sharing with you a little project that I’m about to put into motion. Or, should I say, a big project.

Because it’s big.

It’s huge

BELIEVE ME, PEASANTS.

This March, I am beginning a little big something that I am both equal parts excited for and terrified of. I call it —

March-Hare Madness!

Because I literally have to be as mad as the March Hare to even contemplate trying something like this.

And what is this thing that I’m trying, you might ask? Elementary, my dear Watson. In the month of March, I am going to be finishing everlost. hopefully.

I say hopefully because we all know I’m going to fail miserably.

See, I’ve been ‘saying’ that I’m going to finish everlost ever since. . .what. . .last July? And it just hasn’t happened. I’ve hacked away at it bit by bit for nearly over a year, and have completely rewritten nearly the entire second half of the thing, but have I actually finished it?

NO. I HAVE NOT.

The first half of it is done. In fact, it’s practically readable for all of my lovely betas that are banging down my door and demanding for everlost sustenance. But the second half. . .?

Weeeeell. . . To put it nicely. . .

It’s garbage.

And I am not saying this simply because I’m looking for sympathy and comments like “Awww! Kenzie, I’m sure you’re book is absolutely amazing and — ”

NO. IT’S LITERAL GARBAGE. I’m talking plot holes and unsure motives and a tangled mess so big it looks like Charlotte exploded her entire stash of butt-webs onto the screen and then promptly died.

Okay, maybe I’m over-exaggerating a teeny tiny little bit. (also, I just used the word butt. i don’t know if I can actually do that on the internet. . .) But the second half of this book needs a MAJOR revamp, and that, my friends, is where I begin to swing this post back around to my point.

March Hare Madness is, in a nutshell, a little game I’ve made for myself to achieve a long-standing personal goal — finishing everlost. And because I’m sure you’re all totally not bored by my ramblings yet, allow me to answer in further detail a few of your obviously burning questions that you never asked.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

— WHAT is it? —

I already explained this. Why are you asking this question again, you nincompoop?

But since you are obviously SOOOOO interested, let me give you some deeper details on what, exactly, I’m planning on doing for the next 31 days.

(hint: losing my mind is at the forefront of this plan.)

. . . The Schedule . . .

(what? i’m cool. i can have a schedule. why are you staring at me like that.)

March 1-15 — rewrite the final ten chapters of everlost. . .

While this may seem like a rather easy thing to do — especially for someone who has written 50k in 30 days a whole whopping TWICE in her lifetime (so achievements. much wow.) — I am pretty sure that this is going to be the step in which I fail miserably.

And seeing as though this is the first step. . .this is not boding well.

But I think I can do it, guys. It might require perseverance, a pinch of magic, and a whole lotta sheer and utter insanity, but I THINK I CAN DO IT.

i think i can, i think i can, i think i can. . .

And if I can’t. . .well. . .we’ll get to that in a minute. Eheh.

March 16-31 — completely edit the final thirteen or so chapters of everlost. . .

BECAUSE STEP ONE JUST WASN’T HARD ENOUGH, AMIRIGHT? But lookie there! I gave myself an extra day! Because I’m nice.

And also utterly mad.

MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

But this is also a totally feasible thing to accomplish. Who doesn’t edit thirteen chapters in 16 days? That’s a whopping 0.8125 days per chapter. And for someone who usually comes out to one fully edited chapter every three days?

SO MUCH LOGIC IS GOING ON IN ME BRAIN RIGHT NOW.

So. In review.

I’ve split the entire month of March into two halves. Half One is for finishing the massive rewrite that I’ve been hacking my way through ever since July. Half Two is for going back and editing, polishing, and smoothing out as many plot holes, continuity errors, and character arc issues that I possibly can.

Technically, this should totally be possible for someone of speedy wit and quicker fingers.

For me. . .?

Hahahaha. No.

ALSO. Look, look! I even made a chart! (be proud of me, peasants)

I am SOOOOOO talented.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

 –WHY are you doing this? —

Now this is a good question. You’re getting better at this.

To clear up any miscommunication or confusion, I am not doing this because:

A) I’m tired of everlost and want to be done with it already

B) I’m trying to turn my brain into a rotten raisin because why not

or C) because I’m a complete and total psychopath and have finally found the perfect way to hurl myself over the edge of insanity.

Although that last one is debatable.

Alas — no. I am setting myself up for extreme disaster simply because I think it sounds like fun. I want to finish this book. Not because I’m bored of it or because I want to move on to another project, but because I feel it needs to be finished. I feel like it wants to be finished, and all I need is the proper push and motivation to get me there.

And yeeees, I could totally just wait until April and enter Camp NaNoWriMo with the intent of finishing the second draft then, but come on now. Where’s the fun in that, I say?

Better to turn your brain into a puddle of mush BEFORE going into Camp NaNoWriMo.

Because that makes sense.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

— WHAT is the punishment? —

Whoa. Slow down there, skippo. Your emo is showing.

And also your psychic because WOW THERE ACTUALLY IS A PUNISHMENT, HOW DID YOU KNOW.

For all my fellow Dare Squadians out there, I’m sure it comes as no surprise at all to discover that I absolutely LOVE punishments.

Especially punishments that are inflicted because of my supreme failures as a writer.

So to shake things up and make this whole ordeal even more interesting than it already is, I have enlisted the help of my beautifully talented, deviously mischievous, and utterly terrifying friend, Kate, who has kindly agreed that — in the severely rare instance that I just so happen to fail my March Hare Madness quest — she will inflict upon me a punishment of the highest caliber.

But as for what this punishment actually is, well. . .

I have absolutely no idea.

But it’s sure to be amazing. And quite possibly has something to do with her torturing one her characters that I may or may not deem the most precious smol cinnamon roll alive.

#fun

But whatever this punishment happens to be, you can bet your buttons that it’ll be posted on Kate’s blog, Story And Dark Chocolate, for all to see at the end of March. (or maybe it’ll be on Smudged Thoughts? i’m actually not really sure where it’s going to be at the moment, but IT’LL BE SOMEWHERE OKAY)

If I fail, of course. Heh.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

— WHAT else are you doing in the month of March? —

Because finishing up my entire second draft isn’t enough?

Trick question: of course it isn’t.

See, March is a wonderful month in itself, but all us die-hard fans of NaNoWriMo know that it is merely the gateway into one of the best months of the year — April.

Or, more specifically, CAMP NANOWRIMO!!!! ASDFGHJKL!!!!!!

I LOVE Camp NaNoWriMo. In fact, I love it just a teensy-tiny little bit more than regular NaNoWriMo (because CABINS and TEAMWORK and WORD SPRINTS OF DEATH!!!!), which means that I would be absolutely insane to pass up the chance to participate in April’s Camp.

However. This also means that, if I’m finishing everlost in March, I’ll need to have a completely new novel outlined and ready to go come April 1st.

Haha…hahaha…ha.

SO GUESS WHAT ELSE I’M GONNA BE DOING NEXT MONTH, GUYS???

You got it. I’m going to be outlining.

In the past, I’ve tried a lot of weird, slightly half-baked methods of outlining my novels, but none of these have ever really stuck with me in a way that made me think, “Wow. This is like the absolute perfect way to outline a novel! I shall use this method forevermore.” And because of this, I’m going to be trying something even more different this time around.

Pantsing.

Or as I like to call it — sort of pantsing.

I’m 99.9% positive that I’m going to have literally no time whatsoever to fully flesh out a novel by the time April hits, but that doesn’t mean that I can’t go into the month sort of prepared.

So, in the spare moments when I’m not working on everlost, I’m going to be preparing for Camp mentally, as opposed to physically. Perhaps I’ll dream up a few scenes over breakfast, sketch down some vague ideas for characters and settings when I’m listening to music. . .whatever happens to come to me in the moment. This way, by the time Camp comes around, I’ll have — at the very, very least — an extremely vague yet tangible idea of where I want this story to take me.

And while this will be absolutely nothing like having a solid outline, at least I’ll have something.

It’s much better than being hit smack-dab in the face with a camper, that’s for sure.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

And that’s pretty much it . . .

I know this post was probably extremely bland and lame for all you people out there who A) don’t participate in NaNoWriMo and/or B) have absolutely no interest whatsoever in what I’m writing or how long it takes me to finish it.

BUT. I AM EXCITED FOR THIS. I AM READY. SORT OF. And for those of you who are interested, be sure to stay tuned throughout the entire month of March, because I’m going to be giving weekly updates on how March Hare Madness is going! Which, if we’re being totally honest here, is probably going to consist mainly of hyper, insanely unedited posts complete with colored chart updates and some possible insanity thrown in.

And for all you writers out there looking for something to tithe you over until April, be sure to come back this very Saturday (March 2nd) for the first ever PictoPrompter of 2018! It’s going to be marvelous, my friends!

I mean. . .I still need to actually find the PictoPrompt, but whatever. I’m sure it’ll be great.

Totally.

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talk to me, peasants!

So! What do you think of March Hare Madness? Does it make you want to push yourself over the brink of insanity alongside me next month? (someone please do this with me so I’m not alone. . .) Does it make you think about basketball? Did reading about it for the past ten minutes make you fall asleep? That’s. . .actually quite sad. Are you excited for Camp NaNoWriMo? Do you even know what NaNoWriMo is? Do you wish I would stop asking questions? DO YOU LIKE THE WORD NINCOMPOOP???

Well, then! Let us talk about ALL OF THE THINGS down in the comments below, okay? I want to hear all of your thoughts, opinions, and possible snores. (though that might be hard to type out. . .)

As always, until next time. . .

*flings cookies in the air and disappears*

 

p.s. HAPPY POKEMON DAY, EVERYBODY!!! WHOOOOOOT! (it’s the moooost wonderful daaaaaay of the yeeeeeaaarrrr…)